Monday, November 18, 2013

Positive

I've struggled for months to figure out the right way to make this announcement on my blog.  Something super cute didn't seem to encompass all that I wanted to say.  I've thought a lot about sneaking it into another post (ie my recent Instagram announcement), but in the end I decided that the truth always resonates with people best.

So, here is a little bit about a chapter of our story that I have, until now, not shared on this blog.

We tried for 22 months. Enough time to have had ~2.44 babies.  But, who’s counting? 

Ok, we were.  We were counting the days, the tears and the stress.  We were counting friends’ babies, baby showers attended and thrown, and a whole lot of tests – blood tests, hormone tests, ovulation tests and tested patience along the way.  What we weren’t counting on was, after a long drive and fun weekend, finally seeing a positive test!
 

We had gone to St. Louis for the weekend to catch up with family and friends, and to otherwise getaway!  We were no longer carrying around anxiety toward my expected period because we had a plan.  We would be starting an IVF cycle as soon as I got my period (this post was actually in anticipation of that!) and we had already purchased the prescriptions necessary to get going.  We were filled with nervous excitement. 

I grabbed a pregnancy test at the grocery store on our way home.  I had never bought a box with only one test in it before, but I was certain that I was not pregnant, and one test is all I would need to report that back to the clinic.  I was craving fajitas and forced Andy into helping me prepare them for dinner.  And, because I needed to use the restroom, I thought I’d go ahead and give the test a try.  It quickly became clear that the faint positive sign may be indicating that our life was changing.

But, I didn’t believe that little plus sign, and decided to head back to the store to grab a fool-proof digital test (and a 20 oz. bottle of water!).  There, in our dining room, we sat with the test between the two of us as it thought through our future.  A few turns of an hourglass icon later, the word PREGNANT appeared.  There were no tears or wild signs of excitement.  We simply stared and smiled at our luck – once again learning that you can plan all you want, but life could care less about those plans.

The weekend after we found out.  Mom feels anxious.  Dad feels weird.
In short, Baby Wendling will be making his / her debut in the Spring of 2014! 

You can read a little more about our journey on a few posts that I have migrated over from a previously private blog.  These posts are extremely personal and include details about a uterus, ovaries and sperm... so, reader beware!  If want a starting place, you can read a letter to our lil peanut about our journey toward parenthood here.

Finally, this last note is to anyone out there who is struggling to start their family.  First of all, I apologize for not sharing our story earlier.  So many times I thought hard about it, but ultimately felt that it was too personal to share while I was in it.  Please know that while your journey is 100% unique to you, I understand that the choices are scary and expensive, and it all can feel overwhelming.  For me, it helped to focus on all that I was blessed to have in my life rather than focusing on something that seemed out of reach.  And, it was extremely important to me to continue to welcome my family and friends' news with a joyous heart.  Ultimately, you have to follow your own heart to know what's right for you and your family.  But, should you need a listening ear, I promise to not tell you that you all need to do is relax!!  

Cheers!

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