Are We the Trees?

I recently spent ten minutes talking on the phone with my son’s new teacher. He knows her. She knows him. But I still felt compelled to spend ten minutes explaining his allergies, demeanor, and how he’s handled these last few months.

I’m scared for the school year ahead. Even so, I forgot to ask how many kids are in the class. It was lost on me to ask about COVID-19 protocol. Because in between catching up on email, paying bills, answering text messages, cleaning my house, trying to get my son excited to go back to school without his sister, and explaining to said sister why she’s delayed three weeks for her first day, I am craving the ability to root myself in some semblance of normal. To just talk allergies and demeanors. 

If you’re in the Cedar Rapids, Iowa area right now, you’ve grown used to seeing trees, branches and limbs all around these last few weeks. In fact, they’re downright obstructing our views around each corner. 

They’re leaning. Some uprooted. Some displaced. Some are bleeding. Some have fallen face first into the closest house, seeking some amount of comfort, I’m sure.

The trees are not okay.

A friend asked the other day after I confessed my overwhelm; “what has you overwhelmed?”

All I could muster up was to explain that it’s the sheer magnitude of it all. I’m leaning. Broken limbs all around, and I don’t even know which way to fall.

When those 140 mph winds came tearing through my community, I finally let go of all I had been trying to hold on to for the last six months.

Now I can see all the pieces scattered on the ground around me. And I know I'm not alone. 

Do I send my kids back to school? How can I work and parent? Should I be volunteering more? Do I submit a claim? Should I even be feeling any of this considering how well my family fared? Wait, should I hire a teacher? Am I doing enough to combat systematic racism in this country? Where are everyone’s masks? When does school start? Are sports bras acceptable to wear each day? Are my son’s tears normal or a sign that all this is wearing on him too? What’s a date night?

We are not okay. 

Coconut Allergy Update

It’s been a little over a month since we confirmed Weston’s severe allergy to coconut. And, man, it’s been a journey. My initial reaction was a mix of guilt and relief. Guilt for all that we had put the guy through and relief to finally have an answer. My next thought was; “this won’t be so bad!”

And, I was kind of right.

Coconut is like a crazy little boy who hides in things and then jumps out to roar at you like a dinosaur.

I don’t know, maybe that analogy didn’t work. What I’m trying to say is that coconut is in more places than I expected – and this is coming from someone who previously proclaimed that coconut oil cures all!

What I thought might be helpful is to update people along the way on what we’ve found.

Skincare products

We think Weston experiences rashes on his skin when he comes in contact with products with coconut if his skin is already irritated – think diaper rash + sitting in a bath tub with soap suds that have coconut oil in them. So, we’ve changed the hand soap we use in the bathroom and his shampoo / body wash. And, while this has helped, we can’t control everything. He still washes his hands at school and is a thumb sucker so we notice irritation around his mouth but this seems minor in the grand scheme of things. The products we are using are included below.

Clean Kids Naturally Germ Busting Soap

This doesn’t include coconut oil but does smell like black licorice – not ideal. I will let you know when I find a better smelling product. But, for now, it works!

Trader Joe’s Laundry Detergent

This DOES include coconut oil but we haven’t noticed any major irritation. I usually do an extra rinse cycle when I wash his clothes and so far, so good.

Shampoo and Body Wash

This was hard. I went to my local Co-op and with the help of a VERY nice lady, read the backs of shampoos for a long time. She eventually found this one and while my son smells like a baby hippie (which I love), we don’t notice any skin irritation!

Baby Wipes
I had always used Huggies wipes which I loved but found they had ingredients derived from coconut. So, we switched to Water Wipes which seems to leave his skin less irritated. While the wipes seem much flimsier, we are making it work!

Foods with coconut

This is where we’ve struggled the most. One thing I looked into after learning of Weston's allergy was formula! Weston is no longer on formula but I was curious about options seeing as this was clearly an issue for us. And, I still haven't found one. I will update the blog as I continue to look.

There are obvious places where you find coconut; coconut yogurt, many granola bars, and lots of cereals. But, specifically we have found coconut in the following items;

• PAM cooking spray
• Corn Pops
• Fruit Loops
• Ranch Veggie Stix
• Some Progressive soups
• Chocolate coated ice cream
• Some animal crackers
• Swiss Miss hot cocoa
• Welch's fruit snacks

With food, we've definitely connected Weston's exposure to coconut with breathing issues. He has a specific cough we've identified that signals an allergic reaction and it usually ends with him throwing up. But, all in all he's doing much better and we continue to learn. We're so thankful we've figured this out and just hope there are no additional food allergies.

Cheers!

A Two Year Mystery, Solved!

Please Note: This is a history of our experience. I am not a medical professional in any way!

I remember it like it was yesterday. I was sleep-deprived. Barely back to work, and I made the decision to introduce formula to the little man. I believed all the hype about formula fed babies sleeping longer and I was willing to give it a try. So, I filled a bottle up, rocked my little guy and was optimistic about the sleep we were about to get. He no sooner finished the bottle before he literally puked the entire thing up.

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Since that day – almost eighteen months ago – we have had slightly more sleep but many more headaches. Weston never did take to formula well. He threw it up consistently upon its introduction even at a 3:1 ratio of breast milk to formula.

In addition, Weston has endured countless colds that seemed to always escalate to include ear infections and low oxygen levels. We have gotten tubes in ears, own a nebulizer, and even put him on a twice-a-day inhaled steroid after months of low oxygen levels. And, sporadically in between all of this he has broken out in hives.

An example of one of his hive outbreaks.

For two years we have been exhausted. Confused. And, frankly, sad for our little guy who seemed to never catch a break.

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A few weeks ago, I was excited to pick the kids up from school early and head to the park. Ever the smart mom (ha), I made sure I had a snack to keep any hanger at bay. On this particular day, we’d snack on Larabar brownie bites before hitting the park. Weston barely took a bite before he started whining. Nora responded by reminding him that if he didn’t eat his “chocolate,” she would. Weston responded by puking. I quickly cancelled our park trip and changed routes to head home. Weston continued to whine as we were driving and I turned around to check on him only to notice him once again covered in hives. This was clearly an allergic reaction and luckily these bites only have six ingredients.

Post Larabar hives on his face

As I racked my brain that evening and examined the pictures from all of the other hive episodes, I finally connected the dots – coconut. I had made muffins with coconut oil, given him coconut milk during one episode and now finally these brownie bites were dusted with coconut flour. But, I still couldn’t get right with this being our answer because why in the world had he always reacted to formula as well?! I finally looked up the ingredient list of Earth’s Best Organic Infant Formula and the sixth ingredient listed was “organic coconut!” And, because we tried just about every formula under the sun, I looked up countless others’ ingredient lists and found coconut in every single one.

His reaction following coconut milk

Cue: Mom Guilt!

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I write all of this down and share it today so hopefully it helps someone else. I can’t help but think “if we would have just known!!” Of course, he wasn’t sleeping because his belly hurt. And, while I nursed him for ten months, I certainly supplemented and so wish I hadn’t. Maybe if we would have known I could have just nursed, maybe he wouldn’t have had to go through so many rounds of antibiotics for ear infections or the countless other medications due to his respiratory issues.

So, we live and learn. I’m thankful we’ve now connected some dots and our little man is back to smiling. And, I’m so grateful we can proceed by eliminating coconut from his diet with very little effort. Finally, I hope this story helps some other tired mama out there!

Cheers, all!